Ethan's Dirge
by RavenRyy
Summary: This is a story for My LARP character, he was killed before i could do much with him and i thought it was a bit cheap so i wrote this story to complete the poor guy. RIP Ethan


Ethan Dunsirn Dirge of the lost

The red haze had lifted when the flames had hit. His body had been beaten to a bloody mess, and his soul was blasted by the pain that overwhelmed it. Had he been given time to consider it, he would view what had happened as the standard of his life and unlife. There was always another circle to Hell of existence.

Why?

He had only demanded to know how much danger the Camarilla was placing his family in. The insane Prince had only gone and named a demented psychotic as her scourge. Give a serial killer the task of killing for the court? Only a Malkavian could do such a thing. They attacked him, cruelly attempting to stake him through the heart. He tried to leave, but she just smiled at him. He demanded and begged for help, but they remained silent. The rest was a blur of conflicting information and images; using his power to try and force his way out, a Raven attacking, goading laughter, begging to ghosts to get help, failing, pain, fear, chaos, her smile, his smile, the mist of hate, unnatural flames of a Warlock, unbearable pain, and finally peace. They had beaten him into torpor, of that there was no doubt.

Why?

It was not a restful slumber, his memories where played back at a confusing and accelerated pace; Running away with his mother, being caught, his brother a sister, the taste of meat after they killed mommy, they made me eat her, don't let anything hurt me, keep my head down, please make this make them happy, make me useful to them, family loves me, I should love the family, don't fail the family, fail the family, feed the family, Garry tasted a bit like beef (I ATE MY BROTHER!), Sandy tasted much sweeter (I ATE MY SISTER!), _Keep it apart damnit, you have to keep it apart!_, proving his worth to the family, knowing how to talk to people, telling them what they want to hear, making them do what you (the family, the CLAN) want and making them think it's the best idea, going to collage and praying for a way out _(lisa)_, he wanted a way out _(__lisa__)_, escape _(__lisa__)_, **DON'T THINK ABOUT IT! DON'T THINK ABOUT HER **_(lisa)_!!!

Please God, don't make me think about her _(lisa)._ It hurts too much _(lisa)_.

"You want the fucking truth? My family are monsters! You don't feed the family, YOU FEED THE FAMILY! I don't want to drag you into my hell. I've tried, but I just can't escape them. Just leave…please. You can't help me."

A cool touch, gentle with a quiet strength, spreading around his body as her arms enfold him. "Ethan…I just wanted you to say that. You've been the good son to them for so long. They don't deserve you. You're righter than you know about them being monsters. But for every monster, there is a slayer. Tell me where to find them Ethan. Tell me. I'll tell my friends, and they'll destroy them." The cruel emotion of hope found it's way into him through her words. She held him tightly, and to his surprise, he felt her hot tears on his neck.

"You've suffered so much!" she whispered softly, "Let me help you. Let me save you"

_(lisa)_

Reality

A child asks why. The world slaps him hard and tells him because

"You always hurt the ones you love"

please

"You betrayed the family"

please

"It wasn't just you, something else happened. A lot of us are dead, and we need the numbers"

please

"If you'd been good, you'd have more say"

please

(Ethan)

"It wasn't you fault, but you have to be disciplined I'm afraid"

please

(Ethan)

"She misled you son. Made you act against your kin. We dealt with her friends, now it's yours and her turn"

please

(Ethan)

"Ethan…look into my eyes"

STILL

QUIET

WATCH

_Please no please no don't do it don't do it i love her I love her don't hurt her don't hurt me don't let this happen I don't want this let us go please let us go not like mommy not like garry not like sandy not lisa no_

Ethan?

Don't blame yourself. It's okay my love, it's okay.

**BLOOD! **

**SWEET DELICIOUS LIFE!**

"You're one of us now Ethan Dunsirn. You are kindred. You are Giovanni. Welcome to your true family."

The dreams of torpor ended suddenly. Pain greater than anything his flesh had experienced exploded throughout him. In a few eternal moments, It was over.

Through different eyes, Ethan watched the remains of his body disintegrate into the flames. Messenger had thrown it on the fire with casual indifference. Not even fuel. Just rubbish. The final insult to his life.

"Don't even think about jumping boy. Think the others call us necromancers for the nothing? Be our servant in life and unlife, or be our slave in death. You belong with us forever"

The memory had imprinted itself as a central reason for his life. A slave, fuel, a toy. He was dead. He was a ghost.

Serve the family (no). In life (No). In Death (No). Serve the family (NO NO NO NO NO)

His spirit self fell to its knees and wailed a cry of pain and desperation. Without meaning to, the cry took life, and became a song. A wordless song of grief and slavery and being cheated, and being exploited, and perversion, and denial, and failure and stolen destroyed love. It echoed through the Shadow lands of Inverness and further. The lands of the dead took his offering and drank it deeply. And felt grateful.

His dirge ended and Ethan collapsed on his side. The maelstrom that devastated the Ghosts seemed to heard his song, and answer in the only way it could. Ethan felt the raging winds storm around the building, and begin to rip it apart. Soon it would rip him apart. No peace or happness in life, none in death. The injustice of existence was hammered home further into him. Oblivion beckoned him. It offered an end to his suffering. Just accept it, it seemed to whisper, it's what you've always wanted.

Ethan pulled himself into a ball and thought of his Mother, his Brother, his Sister and …Lisa.

No, he replied, I never wanted this. I wanted them. But more that that…I want Lisa. If she can hear me…

He stood as the ceiling was ripped by the storm. Tears flowed down his face, but he wouldn't give in to his pain. He bellowed in defiance to the maelstrom.

"LISA BLARE! I LOVED YOU! YOU PROMISED TO SAVE ME, AND YOU TRIED TO! THEY MADE ME A MONSTER, AND YOU MY FIRIST VICTIM! FORGIVE ME LISA! PLEASE FORGIVE ME! PLEASE FORGIVE ME, AND PLEASE SAVE ME"

The storm blew harder, and Ethan knew that his final destruction was soon. But in his entire life, he had never accepted the crimes against him as fair ones. He always prayed for another life. Another chance. He'd acted only a few times, but he'd still acted. The people he was suppose to subject. Didn't he keep delaying the blood. In this moment, he knew he would never of bond them as he himself was bound. The storm was stronger now, it's apocalyptic fury had begun to pull at his being. Nothingness awaited.

"No" Ethan cried, "not yet. Please not yet! I have to see Lisa, I have to face her. I have to beg her forgiveness and find out if she can forgive. I need to know if I CAN be saved. I NEED TO KNOW"

If the storm heard his pleas, it was indifferent. Ethan felt himself tearing, felt the chaos around him, and thought of Lisa again. His was sure that his next thought would be his last.

Lisa, I love you always.

The Darkness came like it had always been there. Ethan last action had been to close his eyes.

Ethan? It's okay.

He turned on the spot in complete disbelief. The storm was gone, like it had never been.

The city was gone, just a barren wasteland was left. Lisa stood before him. In his mind, a stray thought that wasn't his seemed to say that he'd suffered enough. She smiled at him with tears in her eyes.

"I heard you Ethan. I never blamed you for what happened to me." she said softly. She ran forward and threw her arms around him. "I failed you Ethan" she sobbed, "You needed me and I failed you! I wasn't good enough, and you suffered for longer. Oh Ethan, I'm so sorry!" She cried harder and held him tighter. Please forgive me, my love. Forgive me Ethan"

Ethan stood still as a statue. A single tear ran down his cheek as he braught his arms around her. "I Never blamed you." he whispered to her softly.

In the new day, they held each other tightly. They where free.

06/06/2009

17:00 hours.

6 May 2009


End file.
